


Caldarium et Frigidarium

by Thette



Series: Caldarium et Frigidarium (Or: Give Barry a Break Already) [1]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Fluff, Forehead Kisses, Gen, Humor, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Sauna, Shippy Gen, Spa Treatments, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Vacation, barry allen is overworked, cold baths, i love mick rory in a sauna, mick rory and leonard snart are heroes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-06
Updated: 2018-11-06
Packaged: 2019-08-19 12:35:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16534682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thette/pseuds/Thette
Summary: All Barry wanted was a day at the spa. And to sleep for a week.Luckily, his two favorite villains can help with the latter.





	Caldarium et Frigidarium

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stellecraft](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellecraft/gifts).



> This one is for stellecraft, happy birthday! Written in a rush and not beta read at all.
> 
> Caldarium is the Roman bath hot room, and frigidarium is the cold room.

The steam rose from the rocks in the sauna, carrying the scent of the herbs gently roasting on a tray on top of the heating element. Barry stretched his neck, letting the heat soak into his sore muscles. He groaned, not sure if he was feeling pleasure or pain. It had been a long month, no, a long year, with no time off. Nobody, not even a metahuman, could save the city in two different ways every day. He'd accidentally admitted to Captain Singh that he was running on four hours of sleep every night for the last three months, and had found himself on a less than voluntary medical leave for a week. He also got a business card for the departmental therapist, but he wasn't planning on using it. Therapy had never really worked well for him. No, what he needed was to relax, to sleep for two days straight, and to make sure that no speedster villains tried to invade his city. Reverse Flash was bad, Zoom was worse, and he didn't even dare to think about Savitar again.

No, relaxation. Work out the knots in those muscles. He had an appointment with a massage therapist later, but he was planning on using every pool and sauna in the spa first. At normal human speed, not superspeed.

The door opened, and two men joined him. He could only see the shape of their bodies through the steam: one of them large and heavily built, the other leaner, but still muscular. He nodded in greeting, feeling that words didn't belong in the sauna. The smaller of them nodded back, and the larger poured more water on the rocks. The heat rushed over him in waves, and he inhaled through clenched teeth, feeling the steam all the way down into his lungs.

"Careful, Mick," he heard, the clipped tone familiar.

Barry felt his shoulders tense, coming up towards his ears. Dammit, he wanted a day off, a day to relax, not a confrontation with Captain Cold and Heatwave in the sauna. But Snart and Rory seemed to ignore him, settling in on the opposite side. Rory was reclining, sprawling across the bench with his white towel barely covering his groin. Snart leaned back, his arms stretched out on the bench above him, wearing a full robe, which was against the rules clearly posted on the door. Barry didn't have it in him to be annoyed. The heat was working its magic again, making him loose and soft. How much would it cost to have a sauna installed at home?

"'Bout as much as ten day tickets here," Rory informed him.

Barry was feeling too good to be embarrassed about having said that out loud. "Huh," he said. "Not more?"

"Less if you're willing to do some DYI," Snart said.

"Never letting you get anywhere near anything important with a hammer again," Rory replied. "My leg still hurts when it rains."

"Never letting you rewire anything after that fire," Snart shot back, and Barry found himself laughing at them. That caught Snart's attention. He leaned forward, and the steam had cleared enough that Barry could see his intense focus on him. "Well, well, if it isn't---"

Barry threw his hands apart in an abortive gesture. Rory didn't know his identity, did he?

"---my good friend Barry," Snart said with a smirk.

"Relax, Red. You're crap at keeping secrets. Both of you," Rory said with a surprisingly fond look at Snart. He reached for the water, and they were once again enveloped in steam.

"That's my cue," Snart said, leaving. "Not my element."

Barry's curiosity was raised, and he followed his favorite villain out. Apparently, Snart was heading directly for the cold pool, no dip in the warm pool first. He dropped the robe on the floor, showing off his scarred chest as he sank down into the freezing waters. He crossed his legs, and let his eyes wander across Barry's body, all the way from his chest to his calves and back again. "Coming, Scarlet? Or is the cold too much for you to handle?"

Against his will, Barry felt a smile on his face in response to the silly pun. He looked around, and they were completely alone. He flashed into the water, only realizing his mistake when it was too late, when the ice cold water reached his whole body at once. He gaped, inhaling with a strangled noise of pain. Flecks of lighting from the use of his speed crossed the water, running up Snart's chest.

"Shocking," was his only response, but he didn't seem disturbed, more mildly amused. He looked completely at home in the water, as if he was one of those winter bath people.

After getting used to the temperature, which wasn’t as freezing as he had thought when he first got in, the water felt so good against his hot skin, closing all his pores, but not letting the muscles tense up again. He looked at Snart again, and if he didn't know any better, he'd think that the man hadn't let his eyes wander from Barry's face once.

"So, what are you two really doing here? Other than mildly torturing me with your favorite elements?"

"Says the man who electrocuted me."

Barry laughed, shaking his head. "You had it coming."

"A little bird told me you're taking a week off, and we merely came to offer our services."

Little bird? Could be Lisa, who might have heard something from Cisco. Could be Kendra, who also might have heard something from Cisco. Either way, a certain somebody clearly needed to get a pair of disappointed puppy eyes in his direction.

"Just like that, out of the goodness of your hearts?"

Snart raised an eyebrow. Barry could hear Rory coming out of the sauna, his heavy steps heading towards them.

"Yer out of yer mind if ya think I'm goin' in there," he slurred, and left them for the warm pool.

As he parted, he ruffled Barry's hair, a surprisingly tender gesture. Snart stepped out of the pool, drying off quickly and pulling the robe tight around his body. He extended a hand to Barry, who took it, getting out much slower than he got in. His hands were not as cold as Barry had expected, and he gripped him firmly, but not overly hard. They moved in silence towards the swinging chairs, and both of them made cups of herbal tea. Rory followed a few minutes later, seemingly happy with his brief dip in the water, and chose a large pitcher of ginger water instead.

"No booze," he said, almost pouting. The expression looked ridiculous on his grumpy face.

"I like it here," Snart explained, repeating the words he used the first time he saw Barry's face. "I prefer this city to be in one piece. Can't have the resident speedster hero burned out. I also happen to have a weapon that's uniquely effective against speedsters."

"So?" Barry asked, wondering where this would lead.

" _So,_ I can take on your villains while you get some much needed rest."

"He can also give _you_ a chilly time out if you don't rest," Rory supplied, which was true. An unpleasant disincentive. Barry shuddered over the memory of frostbite.

Snart sipped his tea, looking for all the world like he belonged here at the fancy spa, with projections of beaches on the walls and far off bird sounds coming from the speakers. He was leaning back, relaxed and almost soft. "Out of the goodness of our hearts, like you said. One week off. Take it or leave it."

"No tricks?"

"Barry, you wound me. Would I ever?"

Barry didn't even bother with a reply, he just stared at Snart with what he hoped was a stern expression. Rory laughed at them, a thunderous sound in the quiet room.

"If I find out that you're using me or tricking me in any way, I will drop you in the backyard of Don Santini. Bound hand and foot."

"Ooh, kinky!" Snart said with a smirk. "Agreed. Enjoy your vacation."

He left, giving Barry a kiss on the forehead as he went. Rory did the same thing, and Barry could do nothing but stare after them. This was one of the weirdest things he'd ever experienced. He shook his head, drinking the last of his tea, and went to shower and change for his massage.

In the changing room, he looked at his phone in passing. There were 50 new messages, all of them from Cisco.

"SOS! CC & HW OTW!"

"Barry, theyre coming for u!"

"B A R R Y!"

It went on like that. Barry scrolled to the end.

"BARTHOLOMEW TIBERIUS ALLEN did you just recruit CAPTAIN COLD AND HEATWAVE to be your temps?"

Barry did answer that one.

" (•_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■)"

**Author's Note:**

> Headcanon: When Cisco is angry with Barry, he doesn't call him "Bartholomew Henry Allen". He calls him "Bartholomew Tiberius Allen". Because using Tiberius as people's middle name is hilarious. (I do that, and so do a lot of my friends.)
> 
> Come scream with me on Tumblr, where I am [bold-sartorial-statement](http://bold-sartorial-statement.tumblr.com/).


End file.
